halo mas adhi, apa kabar? 4 hari lalu barusan buka arsip lagi nih, footage wawancara mendalam yang udah gak pengen tak buka, bahkan tak tunda tunda sampe hari H pengumpulan naskah skripsi, baru tak kebut ngetranskrip rekamannya sampean lagi.
crazy huh how me as a human with messy emotions, try to cover up my truest feeling toward what happened almost a year ago, about your death.
our mind, or at least mine, indeed magnificent and wild in the same time. it excite me yet scares me. not to mention whenever i reflecting at how our mind, or at least mine, could extract me from the current physical reality into imagination realms. for instance, how i chose to made above playlist while counting days to come back to Bali after we happened to know each other for approximately 3 weeks, only. even in those 3 weeks period of time, i already consider and consult my thought about giving my virginity to you. to celebrate my version of following this world’s mainstream way of ending the innocent stage from a human being. crazy how a constant stimulus of anarchy in such short period of time toward my core value of being a church girl, can drove me closer to what my flesh desire the most –experiencing a sexual intercourse–.
but out of above statement of me being nakedly vulnerable, what sickening me the most is how i manage to project my disappointment, anger, nor feelings of being manipulated.
the fact that my expectation contradicted with your-turns-out-marriage-proposal-ready-kind-of-romantic-relationship-with-your-lady,
//
edited at
01:53 WIB
Jumat, 20 Agustus 2021
SUB, INA.
Makasi Tete Manis, You indeed love me.
